Tuesday, March 7, 2017


I got up and helped the kids off to school with a good start to the day
pleasant, steady
Our neighbor is in a crisis and I listen to her 
mourn with her mourning
Off to the store for art supplies for the class 
and cupcakes
for friends
a birthday
and a loss
Lunch served
Supper made
Afterschool snack ready
I tidy and prep for class
welcome the kids and teach, guide, explain, encourage
save smiles for my boys
I take a deep breath and hug them long enough for it to soak in
then quick bites and Cub shirts
bedtime round one with stories and cuddles
bedtime round two with a listening heart
Laundry and lunches
The day is done
Tired but not drained
I am happy for all the chances
 to do some tiny thing for someone
I gave and was willing
and this is good.

Saturday, July 23, 2016

Love It While I'm In It

Oh today
Today was one of those days.
A day where you got to shower and wash your hair with out feeling like you were swimming upstream to do it. 
A a day in which you got to eat breakfast peacefully.
A calm feeling day. 
Today was a day to skype with your traveling sister and feel happy with all four kids crowding your body. 
It was a day to go to play in the water without gathering a million supplies, just a couple of  towels and a handful of granola bars and off we go!
Today was a day to love my children
for my heart to drink them all in and love how they are in this moment
For my boy to be big enough to stay home by himself and me to be happy for him.
A day for my heart to swell as one helped the other climb up the tall side of something at the park.  
Their muscly little bodies mirroring each other,
 one reaching up and one reaching down
hands clasped as they pulled each other up.
A day to sit with my baby in the leaf dappled sunshine as he smiled and kicked completely happy to do just what he always wants, 
to be by me 
be with me
and for me to be with him. 
A day to listen and marvel at the interesting things they say, 
to glimpse how they think, what they imagine.
To glow with each new word practiced and learned.
Today was a day to drive through the fields and watch the haying, harvesting
see the horses and cows with their babies.
to paint all the colors of the grass in my mind.
A day to love as I do every time that I see it, the big sky with it's sun and storms and towers of clouds all happening at once, a different view in every direction.
Today was a day in which, when I lay down with the two smalls for a story and watched them with their heads on the same pillow and they asked me
why are you crying
I could say that my heart was so full of love that it burst
and the extra spilled out of my eyes.
Today was a day that was good.

(Then he said, " Well, pft, why are you sad about loving us???" I explained that they were happy tears but like, clearly, Mom that doesn't make any sense.)

Tuesday, April 26, 2016

A Farewell

Goodbye pregnancy. 
We had some good times together.
 Sometimes you were hard but mostly I enjoyed you.
 I liked your appetite.
 I liked your curves.
 I liked the way you made me feel special. 
 Thank you for the children that you gave me. 
Thank you for the sisterhood.
 Thank you even for the times you didn't wok out.
. Thank you for deepening me.
I will always remember you.