Saturday, March 12, 2011

Seriously Irrational

PMS makes me jealous.
It also makes me grumpy, ragey, and soryformyselfish.
Pretty much everyone I see I am jealous of, literally.
Like, for example, the only person I saw at Wal-Mart today that I didn't think had it better than me was the obviously homeless man fingering through his wallet.
Everyone else was with their families, or they didn't have families and were free to hang out with their friends and do as they liked, or they got to have a job (at Wal-Mart).
See where I'm going with this?
It's not rational.
And then, oh boy, I need to keep myself away from facebook cause there's actual, photographic proof that everyone is happier and has a better life than me.
Look at all the fun things they do!
Look at all the great friends they have adventures with!
Look at all the cute pics their husbands take of them!
Seriously I should just be locked up for 72 hours till the crazy subsides and my sense of perspective comes back.
I probably shouldn't post this post.  
I might regret it in a couple of days but right now I really can't tell.  
Maybe it's funny.

Peace out. 


  1. LOL. In a day or two I will be there, too. Only worse.

    Surely, you don't envy me! If only you knew the half of it! :-)

  2. You're so honest, it is kinda funny that you would post that! I feel the same way and it's not even PMS related! I got to keep the car today because I had to run errands (I will have to go get Roger from the airport at 2am, wake up the kids...the whole drill) but I took Lucy and Sam to a mall and it was PACKED and everyone was shopping and carrying around not ONE, but quite a few bags...and I was thinking...hummm...I don't get to do that...but you know...we only see what is out there to be seen, we know very little of people's sorrows but what they actually display...and most people will want to show all the fun adventures they have, the super cool shots of themselves where they look perfect (some will even photoshop themselves...I would too if I had photoshop, hehehe), AND you know...the real world is so different...our people relationships and our lives get really twisted with the internet and all its "goodness"(I'm totally being sarcastic)...I know you probably know all that and it still gets to you, and I completely give you credit for it. It happens to me too, even though we know better, it kind of just itches under our skin. It doesn't mean we're capital sinners for a little envy going on... I think it's called being human! I liked that you shared your feelings, and please don't lock yourself up (it most likely won't do you any good!). I'm sure that there are lots of people out there who are jealous of what you have! I'm sorry I missed your post on hanging out. I wish I could write more and help you but I've gotta get the kids out of the tub...I hope you aren't too hard on yourself, ok? :-)

  3. Oh I'm so sad I didnt get to go to the mall with you! I like looking at them and thinking, "which credit card are they going to max out" or "why would they wear something like that" or "where do kids these days learn to be so rotten"
    It's really really easy to get hooked on the "what we're missing" boat. Especially when we're pmsing (I get really bad at it) Its hard to be grateful when we're missing what it is we have in life such as our husbands and our friends. I love that you share so much so openly! makes me feel not so unique! ;)

  4. oh, I was just thinking to myself here: my husband NEVER takes pictures of me. And when I see people pics of wives taken by the husbands I get REEEEEALLY jealous, PLUS I begin to think he doesn't think I'm picture material. so it's jealousy and low self esteem. That's a hazardous combination right there...hehehe... He just doesn't take pics period. Anyways... I do get jealous over husbands that do that. I wish mine did. So I guess I'm ok to think that, now that you've shared this on your post! :-)

  5. Im there with you Heather... only Im jealous or everyone *all* the time. Im depressed about it during PMS, but the other 20 odd days of the month, Im still jealous. Jealous of everyone who has a husband, or a second baby, or who got to serve a mission, or who doesnt have a baby while they go to school, or who writes really well, or who has someone to hold their hand, or who has an awesome blog title ;)... Yeah, dont know if this helps at all, but your not alone and idolated in your irrationality at least! :D

  6. Oh but Natasha, I do! ;-) Actually not that much but it's cause you are so open and talk about what you go through, so I mostly admire you quite a lot.
    This is really only a little tip of my iceberg.
    My sympathies for your next few days, hang in there, you will make it through!

    Thanks girlies, you are all funny and cute and nice and I like all of you! and thanks for reading and commenting, it really truly means a lot to me. I love connecting with people, I think it is one of the great purposes of my life.
    I wasn't really being hard on myself just feeling so ridiculously rotten and awful that it was beginning to be funny and I was having a conversation to myself, explaining it all, out loud, so I thought I should write it down (because that is a little less cookoo).

    And you're right, we just need to see the things we're lucky to have.(I can see them today But that was sort of the point I was too irrational to think straight.)

    Oh and Kristi, that sounds like a deliciously spiteful game. Maybe lets play next month. But only once, I'd feel to mean doing it more :)

    Ariane if we Ever hang out I promise I will take all sorts of luscious photos of you and you won't even need to Photoshop them cause you're such a babe!

  7. Oh Feather! I love your posts they always make me laugh! I love to read about other peoples feelings that are so similar to mine. We all, for the most part, never bare that part of ourselves to others, only the happy content side, even if it is mostly a front.
    Love you.

  8. So glad you got the humour Katie! I love you too! It is so good to be honest with ourselves outloud and to realise that there are others who feel the same way we do.